50 Teacher Superpowers

John DabellI trained as a primary school teacher 25 years ago, starting my career in London and then I taught in a range of schools in the Midlands. In between teaching jobs, I worked as an Ofsted inspector (no hate mail please!), national in-service provider, project… Read more about John DabellWhat superpowers do you possess?Everyone knows that teachers are natural polymaths and possess an arsenal of superpowers that are, quite frankly, gobsmacking. These are something that we ‘just have’ because we are ‘just teachers’ and children, for the most part, aren’t even aware of them.50 Teacher SuperpowersTeachers possess loads of superpowers, so here are 50 to start with. They include:having a bladder like a camelhaving magnificent bowel controlhaving eight arms like an octopushaving eyes in the back of your head and at the sidesbeing multi-tasking ball-juggling plate-spinnershaving a memory of an elephantbeing expert in anger managementbeing FBI lie detectors with a nose like a bloodhoundhaving bat-like hearingfinding time even when there is no time left available on Earththe ability to decode any handwriting stylehaving an immune system that defies medical sciencehaving a heart the size of Ben Nevishaving the unbreakable patience of 10 Saintshaving more effervescence than a bath full of Berrocaacting like a GP able to deal with tummy-aches, headaches and vomitinghaving the ability to look like you know everythingbeing a stand-up comedian, actor and presenterthe motivational get up and go of Tony Robbins and Nick Vujicic.the ability to switch from Mr Tumble to Miss Trunchbull in under 3 secondsthe ability to supervise 400 children at ‘break’ without having a breakdownbeing able to turn any situation into a learning opportunitythe ability to extract more Pritt stick out of Pritt sticks that have ‘reached the end’having the ability to transform a blank wall into a learning stationbeing able to fix any photocopierthe ability to sit through CPD and meetings that would unhinge a normal personthe ability to survive on just 3 hours sleep a nighthaving a thicker skin than a Rhino and an armadillobeing calmer than a Buddhist mega monkhaving the ability to eat sweets in class when no one is lookinghaving sophisticated nasal filtersbeing fearless in the face of an angry parenthaving the ability to dress up for special days without noticenever having a ‘lunch hour’, ever.the ability to listen to a dozen children at once whilst marking spellingsthe ability to be stretched in many directions without tearinghaving the ability to see into the futurebeing able to differentiate 300 ways if needs mustbeing able to teach children with complex needs without complaintbeing able to take an assembly with 5 minutes noticespreading happiness and making sure it goes viralthe ability to ignore detailed planning without feeling guiltyhaving your finger on the pulse of every conversationbeing able to teach whilst the grass is being cut outside your classholding the attention of 30 people for a whole day, 5 days a weekthe ability to read minds and see inside the soul of a fibhaving the power of telekinesis over children using a ‘teacher stare’being able to read a story like Brain Blessedbeing able to produce multiple “AHA, I get it” moments throughout the yearbeing able to unleash children’s superpowers.Is there anything missing?SuperheroesTo many children, teachers are superheroes, huge sources of inspiration, people they respect, look up to and admire.In 2016 the Future Leaders Trust carried out a survey of over 6,000 schoolchildren across England, in which they were asked to choose their top three most inspirational people.“Children are most inspired by people with whom they have close relationships. Other than family and friends, teachers provide children with the most inspiration.”Once again, relationships are the key to success. We have the power to transform the ordinary and day to day lives of children and make school memorable, exciting and the best gig in town. If children doubt that we really have special powers then why not share the following quote with them fromDoctor Destiny: You don’t have any special powers!Batman: Oh, I have one, Johnny. I never give up.Teachers display an unwavering dedication and superhuman strength of will and dedication that gives them maximum points in a game of Top Trumps.If anyone asks you what you do for a living and you say “I’m just a teacher” then remind yourself that you are actually a superhero with extraordinary powers.Now go and look in the mirror and inspire yourself.Super Maggie!One teaching superhero is Maggie MacDonnell of Canada and she was recently named the winner of the 2017 Global Teacher Prize. For the last 6 years she has been a teacher in a fly-in Inuit village, nestled in the Canadian Arctic that cannot be reached by road, only by air. In winter temperatures are minus 25C.“Due to the severe conditions, there are very high rates of teacher turnover and many teachers have left their posts half-way through the year, and many apply for stress leave.”The Global Teacher Prize said:“It takes a remarkable teacher just to work in such an environment. But, to do what Maggie has done requires something quite extraordinary, something very special.”Read what Maggie has done here and find out what superpowers earned her the prize of $1 million, then aim high and see if YOU can be next. Related

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